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should sikh girls be allowded to marry inter-religion ?
Posted by: sidhu.hcl (IP Logged)
Date: April 02, 2008 10:48PM

I want all taboban singhs and singhniis to come forward and discuss on the issue of Inter-Religion marriages.

The reason why such instances are happening is indeed lack of knowledge abt SIKHISM, sikhi jiwan, and real and ultimate god Vaheguru. I know here again the credit goes to the parents who either have no knowledge abt sikhism or never bothered to tell their wards abt sikhism, GURU's and SINGH's.

in the recent past we have come accross some instances whn some of sikh gurls got influenced by television and film industry and started thinking tht a hero can only be a Clean-shaved face without a single hair on body and face.

for the sikhs living out of punjab and abroad i think the issue raised is very important and is of major concern.

Kindly cast ur views and tell how situations can be averted?

 



Re: should sikh girls be allowded to marry inter-religion ?
Posted by: Harinder Singh (IP Logged)
Date: April 03, 2008 05:03AM

the topic shud be "shud punjabi girls be allowed to marry inter-religion".
A sikh boy or girl will never marry some one of other religion.

Now, I agree that many of the present days sikhs(amritdharis) were punjabis once and there are lots of punjabis who call themselves sikhs and have lots of satkaar of gurughar but unfortunately they/their kids are not baptized and dont keep any rehit.
I feel in such cases, its pretty tough to stop present day kids to stop marrying someone of their choice, I mean almost everyone is dating and marrying out of ones choice.
so i feel what such punjabis shud do is to marry someone punjabi istead of hindu/muslim or christian.
Here in delhi, there is a young amritdhari couple(with very good rehit and jeevan).
They got baptized after marriage. Before marriage, they were just punjabis, fell in love(or whatever that is) with each other and got married, but deep down they had satkaar for gurughar, both decided to become amritdharis and live gursikhi life.
I have a very close jatt friend, he was clean shaven, drank,fell in love(or whatever that is) and married a punjabi(jatt) girl and now after marriage he has kept hair and I guess, they are planning to chakk amrit too.

 



Re: should sikh girls be allowded to marry inter-religion ?
Posted by: oothpathang (IP Logged)
Date: April 03, 2008 09:04AM

The whole thing about girls wanting to marry clean shaven guys is a result of bollywood's evil influence on our young girls. These girls being young and not knowing much about their religion, history and the meaning behind our kesh easily get emotionally attached to the characters in bollywood. So much so that they even want a real life hero of their own in the form of a clean shaven husband.

Another thing is that bollywood, Indian dramas, Indian media; Indian jokes are full of Sardar Jee jokes in which the Sikh is usually always the fool. Every country, culture has one minority that they like to make fun of. The Americans make fun of blonds, during soviet era Russians made fun of the Volga Germans, Pakistanis make fun of Pathans etc The Sardarjee jokes in Indian culture is very counterproductive to us and gives our youth a low self esteem. Although Sikhs don’t have an inferiority complex to any community in India, but our youth do have low self esteem. Our people are too brain washed by westernization, and like to live a life of comfort.

Now in our panth, youth with full Sikhi saroop is so rare that amritdhari families have no choice but to marry their daughters off to clean shaven boys. Sikh youth in Punjab have no one to teach them about Gurmat.

All our current leadership like the Kala Afghana party are busy fighting about useless issues like Dasam Granth is bani or not while our next generation is not even interested in reading or following Gurbani. Fools!, what is the use doing parchar against Dasam Granth when the next generation has no more Sikhi left in it? These anti-Dasam granth people seem to have so much energy because of all this free time they have, but they just waste it all on useless issues instead of trying to save Sikh youth from becoming Patit.

 



Re: should sikh girls be allowded to marry inter-religion ?
Posted by: hopeless (IP Logged)
Date: April 03, 2008 11:30AM

This is a silly topic ,dear sidhu.hcl you need to understand what a sikh is................punjabies do not count.........its not about from where in the world you were born or what race or creed you are ,it is about those who take amrit...... period................there is no disscussion beyond this point except that I despise Punjabi culture as they have traded a pathetic mere shell for an absolute gem of a spiritual path of the gurus.........and because they need the guru for their sordid weddings (booze,meat,dancing with their sisters)....they consider themselves sikhs......like brandishing their gang colours.....like people in England say this is a christian country but people mock the teachings of Jesus and don't believe in god but need the church for weddings,christings and funerals just like the punjabies using guru ji for there selfish ends.....and within the hour committing evil..........punjabies and spirituality.....don't mix....unless spirituality is a new brand of bacardi

 



Re: should sikh girls be allowded to marry inter-religion ?
Posted by: skaur (IP Logged)
Date: April 03, 2008 01:06PM

"Sikhi" is not a religion - it's a lifestyle. Someone who practices a specific lifestyle according to Gurmat, it is impossible for them to have a successful marriage with someone who does not practice the same or a similar lifestyle.

 



Re: should sikh girls be allowded to marry inter-religion ?
Posted by: skaur (IP Logged)
Date: April 03, 2008 01:11PM

lol...i'd have to agree with "hopeless" as well.

 



Re: should sikh girls be allowded to marry inter-religion ?
Posted by: sidhu.hcl (IP Logged)
Date: April 03, 2008 01:14PM

in my view SIKH is one who is a learner. sikh means "one who has efficiency to learn" .

I dont classify my religion into seprate groups. By creating different catagories inside our religion we are shrugging our shoulders from responsibilities.

an amritdhari singh is Khalsa.

secondly for such incidents i blame the parents who are not able to teach their children about SIKHIsM and teaching of Guruji and about the IMPORTANCE of KESH and about the SIkhs who laid their lives for HUMANIty, truth and religion

I read the story regarding one BIBI in england who saw a "KARA" wearing guy and presume him to be sikh and got married to MUSLMAAN and untimately got herslf into big trouble in PAKISTAN and their she suffered RAPE,HUMILIATION and SOUND BASHING.

I know the situation in punjab is very different here sikhs are in majority and thanks to the POP punjabi media that had enhanced the sikh (turban wearing) chARacter as a hero. In punjab the situation if totally opposite to what sikhs are facing outside punjab.

the objective of this topic is to raise concern abt the issue.

 



Re: should sikh girls be allowded to marry inter-religion ?
Posted by: Harinder Singh (IP Logged)
Date: April 04, 2008 05:49AM

<< in my view SIKH is one who is a learner. sikh means "one who has efficiency to learn" .

I dont classify my religion into seprate groups. By creating different catagories inside our religion we are shrugging our shoulders from responsibilities.

an amritdhari singh is Khalsa. >>>

I agree that there are many bholle bhaale innocent non-amritdhari people with lots of satkaar for guru ghar and there are many challak greedy corrupt amritdharis who do badnami of sikh faith, but unfortunately only an amritdhari can be called a sikh as chakking khande baate da amrit is the primary(first) rehit(thing) a person is supposed to do in order to become a sikh. so basically a sikh is one;
1. who has submitted before the supremacy of the House of Guru Nanak Dev Jee Maharaaj and does not bow his head before anyone other than 11 Guru Sahibaan.
2. Has taken khande de pahul
3. is wearing 5 kakkaars
4. is not committing 4 cardinal sins( thats important as a person wearing 5 kakkaars, acting as a sikh and commiting bajjar kurehits deserves a VERY SERIOUS punishment).
KHalsa is an amritdhari who has done great ghaaalna of naam/bani and is all the time merged into the supreme being(jagat jot japai nis basur.....)

 



Re: should sikh girls be allowded to marry inter-religion ?
Posted by: Harinder Singh (IP Logged)
Date: April 04, 2008 05:52AM

<< in my view SIKH is one who is a learner. sikh means "one who has efficiency to learn" .

I dont classify my religion into seprate groups. By creating different catagories inside our religion we are shrugging our shoulders from responsibilities.

an amritdhari singh is Khalsa. >>>

I agree that there are many bholle bhaale innocent non-amritdhari people with lots of satkaar for guru ghar and there are many challak greedy corrupt amritdharis who do badnami of sikh faith, but unfortunately only an amritdhari can be called a sikh as chakking khande baate da amrit is the primary(first) rehit(thing) a person is supposed to do in order to become a sikh. so basically a sikh is one;
1. who has submitted before the supremacy of the House of Guru Nanak Dev Jee Maharaaj and does not bow his head before anyone other than 11 Guru Sahibaan.
2. Has taken khande de pahul
3. is wearing 5 kakkaars
4. is not committing 4 cardinal sins( thats important as a person wearing 5 kakkaars, acting as a sikh and commiting bajjar kurehits deserves a VERY SERIOUS punishment).
KHalsa is an amritdhari who has done great ghaaalna of naam/bani and is all the time merged into the supreme being(jagat jot japai nis basur.....)

 



Re: should sikh girls be allowded to marry inter-religion ?
Posted by: Harinder Singh (IP Logged)
Date: April 04, 2008 06:03AM

pyare veer hopeless jeeooo , what u have said is true.
But there are lots of punjabis(not sikhs) who have some connenction(pyar satkaar) for guru ghar and do become sikhs at some point in their lives. There are many present day amritdharis who were punjabis once, I myself was a really bad punjabi(the one that u described in ur post, hahahahaha).
Bhai Sukha and Bhai Jinda were monaa punjabis when they sent General vaidya to hell.
So may be we can generate some new word for the punjabis who havent got baptized but do have some satkaar or connection with guru ghar.
in my college a student did nindaa of Satguru, there are quite a few amritdharis and keshadharis in my college but no body took a stand. Me(i was a mona then) and my jatt friends taught that nindakk a pretty strong lesson.

 



Re: should sikh girls be allowded to marry inter-religion ?
Posted by: hopeless (IP Logged)
Date: April 04, 2008 11:46AM

Dear Bhai Harjinder Singh.........that description of punjabies includes me to.....I am over 30 and i did not consider myself a Sikh of any description this past year or so ,(revelation hit me after khalsa camp), until I took Amrit this weekend............gurbani clearly states who is a sikh and we have to take that truth as a bitter pill or otherwise we will never change our course in life or help others to reform...............i refer to punjabi culture as probably a way of self hate ,of a wasted life.......hardship suffered due to the lifestyle given by mainstream punjabi culture/raenee beni..........punjabi relatives cracking jokes at us gursikhs.......oi gidda gyani ji....i am distancing panjabies far away as possible from the idea of a sikh as a way to preserve the image of the ideal khalsa to take care for the feelings of gurji who himself kneeled down to take amrit........punjabies will probably learn the hard way....in just one generation the women drink alcohol......and now with grown up children,drink at wedding parties making fools of themselves..........if punjabi=sikh then so should american=sikh as there are thousands of white sikhs who have had a gursikh upbringing unlike me.......an ex-punjabi desi jatt!

 



Re: should sikh girls be allowded to marry inter-religion ?
Posted by: sidhu.hcl (IP Logged)
Date: April 04, 2008 01:25PM

I feel bad whn we people shrug off our responsibilities towards our people whom i call "SIKHs" and some call "turban wearing Punjabis".

Well i dont classify my religion into differnt CATAGORIES and GROUps. In my terms one who is a "learner" and his having deep faith in SRI guru Granth sahib ji is SIKH. GURUji also never ever classifed his followers into such segments.

SIKh whn got baptised becomes KHALSA. khalsa is the second stage of jiwan for belivers of sikh religion.

I curtailing our own religion into pieces we are doing nothing good for the community. sikh population is world amounts to 2.3 crore while if we pull "turban wearer punjabis" out the cencus will come down to lakhs. GUruji had himslf asked

"aap japo aawre naam japaoo"

Our job is to bring "TURbaN wearing punjabis" to KHALSA not to throw aaway thm.

KINDLY CONCENTRATE ON TOPIC AND CAST UR VIEWS ABT THE TOPIC i will be very much obliged

 



Re: should sikh girls be allowded to marry inter-religion ?
Posted by: Harinder Singh (IP Logged)
Date: April 05, 2008 05:49AM

<<< Our job is to bring "TURbaN wearing punjabis" to KHALSA not to throw aaway thm.>>>

THats a very important statement. Infact I feel many many mona punjabis can also be brought into the sikh panth, What we need is decent number of jyot vigaasis, dasam duaaris in the sikh panth(as used to happen in the 18th century), then automatically people(punjabis, dalits, hindus, goraas) will start becoming sikhs.
RAJ KAREGA KHALSA

 



Re: should sikh girls be allowded to marry inter-religion ?
Posted by: sidhu.hcl (IP Logged)
Date: April 05, 2008 01:43PM

Im very agree with S. harinder singh ji ... with his valuable point of converting dalits into sikhism.

GURUji was against any kind of color, creed, caste bias. he made Guru ka langar, sarovars so that all can sit, eat and bathe together and these type of things can be removed from religion. Guruji called a low caste (gursikh)
"Rangrete Guru ke bete"

But sikhs had again started doing the same by catagorising ourslf into jatt, arora, shimba, majbi, and many more . This is the one of the reason guruji asked his sikhs to use "singH"and "kaur". (dont go after my id my name contain only singh)

i feel very sad to say the extent of discriminiation amoung caste is such tht we had divided the gurudwaras also in villages and some cities. for the past decade due to utter neglegience of the sikh community , and religious leaders the cater tht is created is hard to ruccuperate.

It is because we neglected thm and "hindus" wre clever to pounce the oppourtunity a big drastic change had appeared. I found that most of the majbi sikhs those who wre following sikh religion became follwer of "valmiki samaj".

In punjab 10% people are SC, ST according the national census. u see the people we lossed. Our jharu-poche vali whose husband was amritdhari are now all valmikis. they prefer thmslves to be called as valmikis.

it is due to this maximum loss our "population" is greating getting hurt. sikhs are considered to be "above middle class or middle class" families in india and every sikh is living over poverty line. we dont have any hold on lower caste anymore or have very less hold.

I think the community should take a serious concern and shld start some ground work to get our people back into our religion . I use to teach "jharu-poche" vali son abt sikhism and religion coz they had now started doing pooja and jagratas. we all can do something.

Moreover we all know they can help sikhs greatly in making good population. and moreover we shld follow guruji's teaching.

also i heard one instance it was during Bhim rao ambedkers time tht bhim rao ambedkar was very influenced of teachings of sikh gurus and wanted him and his lakhs of followers to convert to sikhism. But it is lack of intrest shown by "jathedar saab of thn" they have to get thmslf converted into Buddism.

 



Re: should sikh girls be allowded to marry inter-religion ?
Posted by: Harinder Singh (IP Logged)
Date: April 06, 2008 06:48AM

caste and colour are a big problem. The amrtidharis havent left their caste-ism and colour-ism.
if u are a rangretta today, u wont have many people doing beti de sanj with u.
I met some really nice sikhs in karnataka and nanded,they were poor but were great people. They told me that when they come to delhi or punjab, people call them "bhaya sikhs". now this is just totally unacceptable and no surprise present day "sikhs" are getting juttiss.
if u r poor and low caste(so called) sikh, no beti de sanj happening.
if u r jatt, rich, nri or future nri, everybody running after u for beti de sanj.

 



Re: should sikh girls be allowded to marry inter-religion ?
Posted by: sidhu.hcl (IP Logged)
Date: April 06, 2008 02:40PM

veer Harinder Singh ji im very agree with u.

How can we say our religion is teaching "equal status" to all, whn we ourslf are creating caste bias.

"This one thing puts us back with Hindus"

with exception of Hindus worshiping of idols.
(sikhs have also nowdays started doing arti and worshipping of Guruji Photos)
(people have started placing Idols of Sri Guru nanak dev ji on Dash boards)
(i was shocked to see a babaji with dhoop in his hand doing similar actions in front of sri guru Granth Sahib ji and photographs) (some people are practising this in their homes)

it is we shld all raise awareness abt the issue of "caste system iradication" and we shld hold special camps to reinvolve those people who had shedded sikhism. dalits cant be ignored and moreover they are as same as us in sikhism.

 



Re: should sikh girls be allowded to marry inter-religion ?
Posted by: Harinder Singh (IP Logged)
Date: April 06, 2008 09:34PM

who will convert these dalits, vanjaras ? who will do parchar there?
BHAI SAB PAISE DA KHELL HAI. knedda, amrekka, uk parchar karan laye sare tiyaar nee,hahahaha par innaan gareeb sikhan nu parchar karan layee sare piche ho jande ne.
nri bibi naal viaah karrke, apna kakkaar utaar appne sharam vech ke bahar bhajjan nu sare tiyaar ne par innan gareeb sikhan nal koi beti de sanj he nahin karrdaa, hahahaha.
inniyaan maariyaan kartootan ton baad ve aakhde ne ke sanu raaj kyon nahin millda.
kamm juttiyan khan vaale karne ne te gallan raaj diyaan,hahaha

 



Re: should sikh girls be allowded to marry inter-religion ?
Posted by: Harinder Singh (IP Logged)
Date: April 06, 2008 09:55PM

just to add one more thing, i have had darshan of some kashmiri sikhs, maharashtrian sikhs and afghani sikhs, I had a feeling that they are less influenced by money and caste. delhi te punjab tan caste-ism, paisa-ism,standard-ism, sardar-ism, torr-ism, nri-ism de agggggg lagge payee hai.
I have an intution something really terrible is going to happen in these areas before the formation of khalsa raj on the soil of punjab
Raj Karega Khalsa

 



Re: should sikh girls be allowded to marry inter-religion ?
Posted by: mandeep (IP Logged)
Date: April 07, 2008 03:57AM

sikh guys and sikh girls who marry outside probably didn't feel a strong connection within the community, lacked education on sikhi and sikh history, and basicully lacked connection with family.

 



Re: should sikh girls be allowded to marry inter-religion ?
Posted by: Atma Singh (IP Logged)
Date: April 07, 2008 07:22AM

ਵਾਹਿਗੁਰੂਜੀਕਾਖ਼ਾਲਸਾਵਾਹਿਗੁਰੂਜੀਕੀਫ਼ਤਹ

sadh-sangat jeeo,

the thread title: 'should sikh girls be allowded to marry inter-religion ?' made me think the following:

- what about boys?

- 'sikh girls' don't marry non-sikhs. panjabee girls with sikh ancestry/parentage sometimes do for various reasons. i am not in denial regarding the issue, but all i am saying is that it is like saying 'all guroos are fake' and not realising that we are including maharaaj jee in that statement and therefore commiting beadbee.

- the word 'should' in the thread title suggests that we are asking whether 'sikh girls' should be given the right to marry someone of their choice; well, i don't think we can physically stop them.

protecting/retrieving a bibee who is being forcefully married, or made to marry under duress, to someone, and on the other hand trying to prevent a bibee who out of choice wishes to marry someone, are two different situations.

the bottom line is that Gursikhs marry Gursikhs. as for the rest of the panjabee population out there, they don't really give two hoots about Gurmat maryada/lifestyle. it is because of their own non-sikhee, and most of the time anti-sikhee, jeevans that they are 'blessed' with children who do such things...

after all, growing up in a house which promotes and displays gender bias, casteism, spiritually inappropriate clothing, drinking alcohol, meat-eating, partying, shows of maya etc. is hardly the kind of environment that will encourage your children to nurture their love for maharaaj jee...and prevent them from taking up another faith/marrying into another faith aside from Sikhee. as far as they are concerned, what they grew up with is what Sikhee 'has to offer'...not much is it?

this is how i felt in a family of 'Sikh background', up to about the age of about 18-19.

ਵਾਹਿਗੁਰੂਜੀਕਾਖ਼ਾਲਸਾਵਾਹਿਗੁਰੂਜੀਕੀਫ਼ਤਹਿ

ਦਾਸ,
ਆਤਮਾ ਸਿੰਘ

 
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